Title: Firebolt
Author: panbutnotpeter [tumblr]
Characters/Pairings: Hummelberry (Rachel Berry and Kurt Hummel friendship)
Rating: PG
Word Count: ~400
Notes: Submitted for Hummelberry Week Day 2: AUs. Just a small excerpt from a very long fic I've been been trying to write for a while. This bit was totally inspired by Glee's campy, overblown "Firework" performance in Silly Love Songs.
Disclaimer:  No copyright infringement intended; fair use only. Not created for profit.
Summary: Rachel sings. Kurt judges her for it. [Harry Potter AU]

*****

After Kurt and Blaine have walked to the lake and back toward the castle, they decide to settle down beneath a shady tree to continue their conversation. They observe other students trickling out of the castle — some napping off their lunches in the sun, some playing games with magical objects, some huddled in chatty groups.

A collective groan of protest sweeps across everyone in sight when Rachel bursts through the front doors clutching enchanted sparklers in her hands, frolicking across the grass and singing loudly.

“Do you ever feel
Like a piece of wood,
Drifting on a stream,
Just wanting to feel good?
Do you ever feel,
Feel so hard and rough,
Like a goblin thief,
Like nothing is enough?”

“Oh no, she’s singing Kate E. Percival — you have to hide me, Anderson,” Kurt whispers, but when he glances over, he’s horrified to catch Blaine watching Rachel with pure delight, looking as though he wants to jump up and join her.

It doesn’t take long for Rachel to spot the two of them beneath their tree, and she begins skipping in their direction as she gets to the chorus.

“’Cause baby, you’re a Firebolt!
Come on, let your rider jolt!
Make them go ah, ah, ah,
As you fly across the sky-y-y!”

“Rachel!” Kurt shouts loudly as she gets closer, making it clear that he wants her to stop so he can say something to her. She cuts off her singing mid-lyric and stands still, glaring down at him reproachfully for interrupting her dramatic public performance. He sighs deeply. “Rachel, I doubt your lunch was delicious enough to deserve this kind of celebration. What are you doing?”

“Finn and I had a fight, so I’m declaring my independence,” she explains as though it’s completely reasonable.

“By loudly singing a song that’s a metaphor for awesome sex?” Kurt questions dryly. Beside him, Blaine laughs and goes a bit pink in the cheeks.

“It is not!” Rachel gasps, scandalized. “It’s a metaphor for finding something special inside of yourself. I know about these things, Kurt, I find metaphors extremely important.”

“I know you do, sweetie,” he says indulgently. “I’m just saying maybe there’s a better way to get a message across to my brother, who struggles to see deeper meaning in things. Also, the sparklers are totally overkill.”

Rachel frowns, drops the burning sparklers onto the grass, and indignantly stomps them out.

*****

Title: Smile & Breathe
Author: panbutnotpeter [tumblr]
Characters/Pairings: Hummelberry (Rachel Berry and Kurt Hummel friendship)
Rating: PG
Word Count: ~660
Notes: Just a super quick, unbeta'd drabble. Written for Day 1 of Hummelberry Week. The day's theme is Broadway.
Disclaimer:  No copyright infringement intended; fair use only. Not created for profit.
Summary: Rachel supports Kurt through his first big Broadway role.

( Kurt doesn’t understand why he’s panicking like this. )

Title: How to Bend Without Snapping
Author: PanButNotPeter
Pairings: Chrax (with a small side of Colfink friendship)
Summary: Chris Colfer and Max Ehrich are really close friends. Like Max told his twitter followers: they definitely “are NOT” dating. They just have friendly no-strings sex whenever they can, because it’s easier that way. Chris really wishes things could stay that simple, but their non-relationship gets complicated during an evening at Chris’s place.
Word Count: ~7,400
Rating: R
Disclaimer: Not real, never happened, all just my imagination, no affiliation with the actors, please don’t sue, etc.
Author’s Notes: This isn’t the Chrax fic I set out to write two months ago. That was going to be a sweet story about their entire past together, but I hit a major block while writing. Then I decided to try unblocking myself but writing something completely different, and this is the result. JUST A DIRTY HEADCANON DUMP WITH TOO MANY FEELINGS, BASCIALLY. Please don’t pull a dick move by tweeting this to the actors or anyone who knows them. THEY DON’T NEED (OR WANT) TO SEE CRAZY SHIT LIKE THIS. This is just a silly fan’s little fantasy -- just for fun -- so shhh don’t tell.


~*~*~*~

( “It’s getting harder,” Max says suddenly. For a moment Chris is really confused, because he’s pretty sure they’re both already as hard as humanly possible, but then Max swallows and gasps and manages to continue, “Harder to be away from you.” )

Title: She Gives You Food, and She Gives You Rest, and She Draws You Close to Her Giant Breast
Author: panbutnotpeter
Movie Adapted: Dirty Love
Characters/Pairings: Quinn/Mercedes (<3), Quinn/Puck, Tina/Mike, Tina/Quinn/Mercedes/Kurt (friendship), Jacob/creepiness. Discussion of Tina/Artie. Brief mentions of Quinn/Finn, Kurt/Finn (one-sided), and Sam/Kurt (one-sided gossip).
Rating: PG-13 for language and underage shenanigans
Word Count: 5,095
Notes/Credits: Nine hours ago this was just a half-written fic. I tried my best to pull it out in a pinch. The title is lyrics from Giants in the Sky (of the musical Into the Woods) which can be heard [here]. Franz Ferdinand’s song Michael ties into the overused sleepover trope plot (which is nothing like the movie at all) and can be heard [here]. Thanks go to my sister for offering to beta while I fidgeted and read nervously over her shoulder.
Disclaimer:  No copyright infringement intended; fair use only. Not created for profit. Written for the reel_glee challenge.
Summary: Quinn’s terrible day becomes a turning point, Tina and Kurt perform an impromptu musical tribute to Mike and his dance moves, and everyone thinks Mercedes is awesome.

( Quinn’s stomach drops, but then Mercedes is smirking at her, tightening the grip of their held hands. )